Confidence

I'm pretty sure it's no secret that I am confident in myself. I think most of my friends and family know this. What I think most people don’t know is how I got to where I am. I had plenty of trial and error over the years and there are a few principles and applications I discovered helped along the way:

1. Evaluate Your Core Beliefs

I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I am a daughter of God. I have a perfected and exalted Savior that loves me and died for me. I rely on these to conduct any other beliefs I have. I had to evaluate this all throughout middle school and high school. I was different and I hated it. I prayed, I read, I studied and I eventually came to trust myself in my differences and what that could truly mean for my potential.

2. Do Something You Fear

I was in college in desperate need of a job (still weird to say that as a pastime). I have a friend tell me about a group interview happening for the ropes course on campus. I went, got the job and had to start training. I am deathly scared of heights, the stomach drop when you fall, wind up high etc. So my boss tells me I can’t get certified to work unless I climb to the top of this 55’ tower. Thankfully, the desperation pushed me to the top, and a really long prayer they whole way up.

3 years later, I became the assistant manager, I was CPR and First Aid certified, I worked at the off campus ropes course, I did a giant swing, power pole, and zip line, I was an AFY counselor, I learned all about horses, I made a ton of friends, I learned how to drive a snowmobile, dance like a fool, cross country ski, and tie a ton of really cool knots.

I would not have had any of these skills or experiences had it not been for the one choice to go interview for something I fear. I overcame fears, anxieties, worries and built confidence all along the way.

3. Live in the Moment

I can still remember when I hugged my mom goodbye after she dropped me off at college, the first time I rode a horse running, the first time I got flipped country dancing, sitting on a rock by myself staring at the Teton range, speaking at the UN, sledding in complete darkness while it was snowing, and when I saw my best friend get married. One of the most beautiful things you can do in life is take a step back and take it in. The beauty not only comes from seeing and feeling but from the skill it takes to be able to do this consistently.

4. Document It

You only regret the pictures you didn’t take. First of all, I have been blessed with friends who are good at this and taught me what to do in front of a camera. I still stink at it, but they definitely help when I am feeling vulnerable.

Don’t be afraid to ask a random stranger to take your picture at a cool place! I try to do it wherever I go. Plenty of people have taken a picture of that mountain or beach but not many will get to take a picture of you being there! I think it is important to have this skill because later when you have kids they will want you in the picture not just taking it.

5. Talk to a Stranger

Yes. Embrace what is human nature. It is not as hard as you think to go up to someone and start a conversation. It is scary but will you die? No. You’ll either leave an impression, make a friend, learn something new, or just have a conversation. It can be hard to put down the phone and have face to face interaction but I promise it’s good for you.

I use to dread talking on the phone. I use to cringe introducing myself. And I use to hate talking in general. Now if you asked me, I could get up in church tomorrow and talk all 3 hours through all 3 classes about the Gospel. I only say I can do this, because I’ve practiced, and use a bit of self discipline and coercion to have the confidence I do.  

Take a chance on being uncomfortable. We all need to be more comfortable trying to be uncomfortable.

As my dad would say, moral of the story is, confidence can be beautiful, but it takes time! Practice it over and over and it will slowly contribute to a growth mindset that will lead to success in other areas of your life.

(If you want a good read, Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol S. Dweck) Mindset is a topic for another day. Until then take a step and jump!

New Year New Job New Home

I am overwhelmed. I am fearful. I am avoidant of possibilities. I am questioning all of my adapted philosophies on life and people.

I have been looking forward to 2017 since 2016 began. 2016 was rigorous, tight, near impossible and made me cry myself to sleep one too many times. Oh, but how great is the hand of the Lord in my life to help me learn why.

2017 can be described as a new home, new friends, new job, new town and comes with ample amounts of questions. I had no desires to live here but yet here I am loving how hard I have to work to learn. I was intimidated by my new job but I LOVE my relationship with my boss. Wisdom does not come with age, it comes with experience and choice and she is a prime example. I was worried that I would not fit expectations that the kids have of their teacher. Somehow here I am, being me, learning in the job and realizing that there is a reason Christ lists the attributes of a child as things that will be worth your while. They teach me, mold me, humble me, humor me and somehow through the tension I know they feel, they still love me.

Jagger is beautiful. Her spirit is designed to love and to be loved. That is all I have ever wanted out of life and here it is manifesting itself in the form of a fiery, sassy, confident, blonde blue-eyed 5 year old.

Weston is soulful. He is care free and works hard to make people smile and laugh. He can play the guitar and when he does he sings from his gut and heart because the passion is begging to show. He loves to read and understands his scriptures better that any child I know.

Boston wants to be accepted by everyone. He will work so hard in any capacity he can to please people. Whether is is figuring out a problem in math or dancing in the kitchen to Mulan and The Goofy Movie he will find a way to go the extra mile for others.

I love knowing that I can accept criticism and correction and be okay with it. I didn't even know I possessed that talent. It is definitely a new one. 2016 prepared me for 2017. I was consistently being humbled by the Lord's will for my life. I am so grateful he took the stubborn in me and beat it up a few times to take the pride out. It has made a world of difference.

At this point all I can say is bless my heart for taking this long to figure out some obvious flaws and bless my heart because now comes the task of refining them into strengths.

HRJ

Alabama vs. Reality

Confession:

I hate to admit it but I now secretly love being able to say I call Idaho home, especially Teton Valley and my vacations are spent where I used to call home.


Sundays in the South:

I loved being home and being able to catch up with my home ward and meeting all of the new members. This is Nikki. I went to high school with her and she converted 2 years ago and now she's married and pregnant so next time I see her she's gonna have a baby! Also my mom and I went to a piano recital for my sister's best friends since she wasn't able to go because she was at the beach.

Rachael Graduated:

My sister Karen came down from Nashville with my baby niece Elizabeth and my brother Joe works downtown where it was held so he was able to come as well. I'm so proud of her and all she has accomplished and I can't wait to she what she decides to pursue.

Graduation Cookout:

I loved seeing so many people come together to support Rachael and what she has done but I especially loved seeing my family. I surprised my nieces and nephews and hung out with them the whole night. My oldest nephew is now taller than me!

Fishing for Days:

How do I spend my last night at home? I fish. It is one of my favorite things to do and I was the only one who caught a bass. I caught 5 for the night. Don Paul just wanted me to take a picture with his catfish so I took one with Hunter who leaves for his mission on my birthday next month to Spain. Last time I get to see him for 2 years!

Home to Home in 1 Day:

Usually when I travel home I break it up into 2 days because it is such a long drive to Idaho alone but I did it all in one day on Wednesday. Woke up at 4, flew to Dallas with a 2 hour layover, then SLC, then drove 5 plus hours to Teton Valley. I got a beautiful sunrise before I got to the airport and when I got back to Idaho I got a rainbow in my backyard.

JOSH TURNER:

Thursday I went to a sold out show at my school for Josh Turner. I went with my friend Daniel who has heard of him but doesn't know much of his music. I'm pretty sure he loved it. Scotty McCreery came 2 years ago and sang a cover of Your Man and Mr. Turner ended the night with that song. It was great to say I've heard it twice on the same stage. We had amazing seats too!

Training:

Thursday I also started my training to be an AFY counselor and so far it has been a blast and a ton of work. I got chosen to be one of the wranglers so all that time at President Wilson's paid off! I also live with 34 people and that has been one for the books as well.

Week 3 Adventures

Train Trestle:

For our Sunday afternoon a couple of us went to this really cool hidden gem in eastern Idaho called The Bitch Creek Train Trestle. Soooo the name of this creek that runs under the train Trestle is Bitch Creek! It comes from the French word Bishe which means deer! So the original name was Cove of Deer or Anse de Bishe in French. The trestle is also 135 feet tall and was built in 1923!! It is huge and so fun to go adventuring around. Here is Meredith and I goofing off and loving how cool this place is. It is so fun that we went twice this week, Sunday and Saturday. Also the sunset was on point! Pictures have no justice.

From Saturday:

 Week 3 Wrangler:

Horse back riding was really fun this week! It was so fun Monday I decided to go again Saturday. I went with my friend Josh on Monday and he knows Indie from last summer so they got along really well. I liked going this time to familiarize myself with the trails that I will be using throughout the summer.

Saturday was hilarious though. It was cloudy up in the mountains so he made me wear chaps! It was really nice to have the extra layer because it ended up getting colder but the best part was we were coming to the open part with fewer trees and President Wilson took off running with Indie and Ebony followed! Riding a horse running through national forest is not something very many people get to say they have done. It was so exhilarating to be comfortable in knowing what I am doing but new enough to still make my adrenaline pump!

 

From Saturday:

Harry Potter 7:

I finished Harry Potter for the second time. I started the series last summer and with one semester of 18 credits and one semester of 13 credits I'd say I did it with great timing! I also cried. Again. Thank you J.K. Rowling for opening my eyes to so many real world problems we are facing through the problems that fantasy faces.

IBC (Integrated Business Core) and Fences:

This week a group of students that are business majors came up to bond with the people that they will be running a business with for the spring semester. They are assigned in groups to a teacher and 2 facilitators. The teacher that was assigned to my group was Brother Morris. He is from Bessemer, Alabama!! I loved talking to him and hearing his story. He brought great insights in to the lower course elements and what could be learned from them but he also related the higher course elements to things I had never thought about. I loved having him there to teach us, including the facilitators.

On one of the upper elements my co facilitator was not comfortable with the upper element facilitation so I ended up sitting on top of the inclined log and changing people out! It made me a little nervous but it was nice to get use to the height again! Can you guess which one is Brother Morris?

Our big projects this week for work were picking up all of the debris from cutting down trees all over the property and adding it all to our massive burn pile and building 2 fences! One for the staff parking lot and one for Keith's front yard. The parking lot fence was really difficult because we had to go down 2 feet and at about a foot we would hit the water bed and have to dig the mud out with our hands! A whole foot of mud for a wide fence post. It would have been more fun it it had not been so cold but the water was freezing so we kept taking turns digging it out. This is all the girls working in Keith's front yard.

 Extra Thoughts: I got a farmer's tan/burn this week! Went on a date, watched The Man from Snowy River and Bourne Legacy.

I Can Do Hard Things

Wrangler Training
This week I started of my weekly training with my branch president to learn how to wrangle horses in preparation for AFY. He is giving me a golden opportunity for free that most people pay thousands of dollars for. It sounds fun, and it is, but it is so much work! I am excited for what I have learned so far and will continue to learn before AFY starts at the end of May. Thanks to Natalie for coming with me!

 

He also is having me memorize 3 poems about horses. Here are 2 that he has given me so far:

Horse Sense

It must have been a right smart horse

to figure out the proper course

to keep himself free from flies

and not forget his hears and eyes

you see, a horses bushy tail is made to switch

just like a fly swatter,

and tho he whips it hard and rough

the dang thing just ain’t long enough.

Hung clear back there on the south,

It just won’t reach his pestered mouth

And flipping ears and blinking eyes

Are no account for scarin flies.

Then one horse to the other said,

you flip your tail across my heard,

and then your tail will work for me,

and free from flies be both shall be.

Now there you have cooperation,

used by horses since creation,

so human problems small and great,

Use Horse sense and cooperate.

Horses

On Horses We Find Two Legs Behind

and Two We Find Before;

We Stand Behind Before We Find

What the Two Behind Be For.

When We're Behind the Two Behind

We Find What These Be For;

So Stand Before the Two Behind

and Behind the Two Before.

Church Famous!!

I found out that I am on page 56 of the conference issue of the Ensign! All of my friends wanted to tell me about it too! Thanks goes to Gretchen for all of the fake laughing we practiced! Check your Ensign magazine if you would like to see me laughing at myself for fake laughing!

Lumber Jack

I also chopped down trees for a whole day of work. I mean I sawed and chopped. All of the chainsaws for the facility were in the repair shop the whole week and the trees needed to be cut down all over the 200 acre property. We got about 4 major sections done and I got my butt handed to me on what hard work really is.

Inclined Log

I got trained this week on a ropes course element called the inclined log. All you do is walk up this 25 foot log that goes up from the ground to about 20 feet high. It is really steep and the only grip you have are these pieces of rope stapled to the log. I was in my work boots (horrible planning) so that made it harder. The goal is to go up this log without falling or squatting to use your hands. It was extra hard because I am scared of heights (ironic that I work at a ropes course) but I got all the way up without slipping or using my hands!

Railroad Ties

Also this week we had to make a new path with railroad ties. All we had to move these ties down the path to wear we needed them was 2 bungee chords and a dolly. It was 2 other girls and me (one of them being very petite) moving 8 of these where they needed to go. I have bruises all over my shoulders from the weight but we moved all of them by ourselves! But the real work came in when we had to stake them down to the ground! Pounding in 2 foot long 3/4 inch wide stakes was probably worse than cutting down trees!

Shooting

I ended off the week in the best way I know how with friends from church. We went shooting! It was my favorite part of the week! I shot a 12 gauge, a 12 gauge semi-automatic (my personal favorite), and an AR 15 that my friend built! There was a beautiful sunset to match!

Bonus!

I saw a heard of 50+ Elk on the way home about a mile from the ranch where I live. Here are some low quality pictures to prove it: